F**K The Shoulds

Stop feeling burnt out by being and doing what you or everyone thinks you should!

Have you ever felt like you were trying so hard at this thing called life? And somewhere along the way of trying, you have a moment of wondering what am I actually doing with my life? Who the hell am I? 

I worked really hard at life. I tried to be and do what I thought I should. I believed that would make me feel whole, successful, and accepted. 

It wasn’t until I said fuck it to all the shoulds, shouldn’ts, I have to be this, do that, this is right and this is wrong, did I find myself. 

And you can too! You can find yourself again. Rediscover your passions and live life on your own terms. 
Now this is a long road type of journey. I am still working on it myself, still asking myself who am I, and what do I want. Still catching myself in old patterns. But even when it is hard, I am still a lot happier then when I followed things that weren't true to me.

Let these three things help you start your journey, provide inspiration, and bring up questions in yourself you don't have the answers to yet.

  1. Words are Powerful

I am not the first one to point out that our words, what we think, and how we say things shape our reality. But man is it a game changer! What we say and how we say it can create our energy, shape our perspective, and design our life.

So a good place to begin is to change how you have been voicing your decisions.

Let me ask you this. Do you say should, shouldn't, have to? We all have and most likely we all do sometimes.

I have made it my mission to replace these words. And I encourage you to try and do the same. Even when it comes to the most mundane of things, see how it can shift your energy, your sense of control, and overall well being.

I'll give you an example. Let's use the idea around work. Whether you like what you do or not. You could say " I should get up at 6am to get to work on time because I have to clock in before 7:30am and I shouldn't be late again."

Or you could take that whole scenario and say "I want to get up at 6am because it makes it easier for me to clock in at 7:30am and I want to be on time to show I am dedicated to this job."

How we phrase things can be powerful. In one the control is outside of ourselves. It is a rule, that in no way says, this is what I want or would make me feel good. The other is stated in a way where you appear in control, you are doing things that make your life easier, and have a reason, such as showing you are dedicated to the job.

This takes a lot of practice! So be patient, try it and see what happens.

2. Listen Internally and Ask Internal Questions

I don't know about you, but I spent a lot of my life listening to other's opinions on what I should/nt do, and who I was. And that lead me to pain, feeling lost, and a broken relationship with myself.

But I will be the first to admit, listening to yourself and asking yourself tough questions is hella scary.

My advice to you is to stop asking others and take a scary deep dive into yourself. It doesn't matter if you have no idea who you are or have any answers to the questions you seek.

All that matters is that you take the time to be with you. To want to explore who you are and what the possibilities could be.

Just go there. Ask yourself Who Am I? What Do I Want? What Do I Need? What Would Make Me Feel Good? Am I Willing To Feel Good?

or make up your own questions. Then all you have to do is listen. But listen internally. If it is blank, keep asking. Write out thoughts that arise. Keep exploring. Keep creating space for yourself.

3. Experiment

No one has all the answers. But those who seek them, who get out of their comfort zone, try what they never have before, find something more valuable along the way. They discover more about what makes them feel alive, what they dislike, and learn so many lessons that cannot be learned by just staying in one place.

So get out there and experiment. If you think you may want something, explore it. Go to a class, say yes to an invitation, book that ticket.

Play BIG. Life is incredible, scary, and meant to be lived. Stop following the guidelines that are placed upon you, and create your own.

This is my passion, to unlock who you really are, not what you think you are, not your limitations, not your society, but who you are to the core. And to enjoy the journey when you finally say yes to wanting to seek your authentic self.

I hope this has inspired you to think outside of the should/nts. To want to take the first step to discovering your needs, passions, and approach to life.

I believe in you and I believe you can create endless possibilities. You don't need a coach, but if you want one I am here.

You can email me at chelseycooperhealing@gmail.com or visit my offerings page Here

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